I can't handle not having answers...not in the sense of like the future..(I actually enjoy not knowing what will happen...) but I mean in the way of comprehending a situation. I think I have been so internally afraid to come home because I knew it brought me much closer to having a run in with him...
and of course I let a friend talk me into going out last night and I of course see him. Normally I would have just talked to him anyway...but I'm so hurt by one sentence he said that I couldn't even open my mouth....
plus i honestly believe deep down that he needs to try and make it better..and a hug isn't enough to do it...nothin physical will make it better....only two words can...
..."I'm sorry"
the Sartor
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Saturday, December 20, 2008
Hey Hey
So, I'm sitting in Philly's airport right now, reflecting on my experiences in San Francisco thus far...(i feel like I'm back in undergrad with my late night/early morning philosphy...lol) My experience is to be somewhat expected as far as the W curve goes. I came in very excited....but the first month or so after I was ther eI had to go through a lot of changes to adjust....making friends, finding my balance, etc....and I'm just starting to feel set up, around this time of my break...
So, it's been a good experience over all. I've known, even through all the down time that I made the right decision. I mean I had small doubts when I was having trouble juggling things, but the level at which I finished my classes and my final projects has given me confidence that I am definitely someone with talent in the field I have chosen, and I am also confident that the Academy will assist me in finding the level of professionalism and taste that I need to carry into the working world.
Also, I feel emotionally comfortable in San Fran..the social climate there is one that I can get down on...everything is so chill there...its' nice...it helps me balance out my stress levels..I don't fret as much and I like it....the only downfall to the relaxed way of life is that the club scene is not what I'm used to....San Franciscans don't know how to club like we do on the East Coast..but that's what Vacations are for..lol..
Anyhow, overall, I'm happy with it, and after much rest, I am excited to head back....
:*
the Sartor..
p.s. I'l include pics of my work, or links at least when I get it back next semester!!
So, it's been a good experience over all. I've known, even through all the down time that I made the right decision. I mean I had small doubts when I was having trouble juggling things, but the level at which I finished my classes and my final projects has given me confidence that I am definitely someone with talent in the field I have chosen, and I am also confident that the Academy will assist me in finding the level of professionalism and taste that I need to carry into the working world.
Also, I feel emotionally comfortable in San Fran..the social climate there is one that I can get down on...everything is so chill there...its' nice...it helps me balance out my stress levels..I don't fret as much and I like it....the only downfall to the relaxed way of life is that the club scene is not what I'm used to....San Franciscans don't know how to club like we do on the East Coast..but that's what Vacations are for..lol..
Anyhow, overall, I'm happy with it, and after much rest, I am excited to head back....
:*
the Sartor..
p.s. I'l include pics of my work, or links at least when I get it back next semester!!
Friday, December 5, 2008
Wings
...lol, so, I haven't posted in a long time..but I had to share my new found obsession...I want to make a pair of angel wings..lol
I just watched the 2008 Victoria's Secret Fashion Show, and it has re-sparked my love of the wings...of course..
So, I'm already plotting to do an elaborate Halloween Costume...(which I have no idea where I can go with Wings..lol, but I'll make it happen. Anyhow, I want to do a gladiator angel so of look..I think it will be hot if I can pull it off. I'm going to play with faux leather for the harness and a midpiece...and do a rustic look with gold metallic finishes...I figure it will help me learn a lot of new techniques as well..so it'll be fun...time to start saving up..lol
anyhow, I hope everyone is well!
the sartor..
I just watched the 2008 Victoria's Secret Fashion Show, and it has re-sparked my love of the wings...of course..
So, I'm already plotting to do an elaborate Halloween Costume...(which I have no idea where I can go with Wings..lol, but I'll make it happen. Anyhow, I want to do a gladiator angel so of look..I think it will be hot if I can pull it off. I'm going to play with faux leather for the harness and a midpiece...and do a rustic look with gold metallic finishes...I figure it will help me learn a lot of new techniques as well..so it'll be fun...time to start saving up..lol
anyhow, I hope everyone is well!
the sartor..
Thursday, November 6, 2008
updates
Hey Guys
How's it goin? (I'd really like to kno) lol. I'm doing well. Still pretty busy, but managing a lot better. I got a bike, so I can ride around and get places faster...and it's fun! I've been going out and making more friends...I still feel a little isolated, but I think it will pass with time...Everything is pretty....chill..not much to report...weird right?! I know..no drama in my life...I like it..
Hope ur well
the Sartor
How's it goin? (I'd really like to kno) lol. I'm doing well. Still pretty busy, but managing a lot better. I got a bike, so I can ride around and get places faster...and it's fun! I've been going out and making more friends...I still feel a little isolated, but I think it will pass with time...Everything is pretty....chill..not much to report...weird right?! I know..no drama in my life...I like it..
Hope ur well
the Sartor
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
heya
The past few days have been weird. I've been trying to figure out what I want and need emotionally, I guess. I'm single again, but I don't feel like its right. So I'm trying to figure out whether I should wait to see where things go? Or look for some sort of new companionship, or just fool around...I don't like any of these Ideas, but I REALLY don't feel like being alone. I still feel pretty isolated in the city. So I've been trying to find some new partners in Crime (Miss my MU, DC, and NN Fams...you know who you are).
Been trying to focus on just class and such, but oddly enough, its harder after Sunday, like I have some spot to fill...and I don't like it...
O well...gotta play the hand I'm dealt I guess...just waiting it out til the last card is drawn, and I can move onto a new hand..lol...
O! in juxtaposition to this, I went on a bike ride by myself to Sausolito and back. It was pretty nice too..I finally crossed the Golden Gate, and saw a beautiful skyline of the city and Twin Peaks framed by the fog....too bad my camera is bad ass enough to capture it...Also, Sausolito is goregous..its a quaint little beachtown. I'd love to retire there..or at least go for a night...dinner and a stroll by the water...one day..lol
Anyhow, I had that moment again...where I saw all this beautiful stuff, but have no one to share it with...funny how I always find myself there..
"Morning. Strawberry sky dusted with white winter powder sugar sun. And nobody to munch on it with"
Night All..
The Sartor
Been trying to focus on just class and such, but oddly enough, its harder after Sunday, like I have some spot to fill...and I don't like it...
O well...gotta play the hand I'm dealt I guess...just waiting it out til the last card is drawn, and I can move onto a new hand..lol...
O! in juxtaposition to this, I went on a bike ride by myself to Sausolito and back. It was pretty nice too..I finally crossed the Golden Gate, and saw a beautiful skyline of the city and Twin Peaks framed by the fog....too bad my camera is bad ass enough to capture it...Also, Sausolito is goregous..its a quaint little beachtown. I'd love to retire there..or at least go for a night...dinner and a stroll by the water...one day..lol
Anyhow, I had that moment again...where I saw all this beautiful stuff, but have no one to share it with...funny how I always find myself there..
"Morning. Strawberry sky dusted with white winter powder sugar sun. And nobody to munch on it with"
Night All..
The Sartor
Monday, October 20, 2008
meh...
So, I just want to vent a bit....I'm overworked, underpaid, and (much to my disliking) newly single. I've been trying to make it all work...but it looks like it's been too much. I fucked the relationship to hell, and all I can seem to do is work. I don't do anything fun, so I guess it's time to just start saying fuck it (mostly to sleep I guess) and just go out and be silly.
I need to meet some people, shake my ass a bit, be crazy...I'm in San Fran, right?
...I dunno, I just wanted me and this boy to work out, I felt like we could, but he has no reason to believe that, and it's not fair to make him wait. I think I may have lost out on the one guy who has been the best to me...o well, I would screw up something good...
...well, like he said, if it was meant to be, right?
ok..time to go to class and get it together..
the sartor
I need to meet some people, shake my ass a bit, be crazy...I'm in San Fran, right?
...I dunno, I just wanted me and this boy to work out, I felt like we could, but he has no reason to believe that, and it's not fair to make him wait. I think I may have lost out on the one guy who has been the best to me...o well, I would screw up something good...
...well, like he said, if it was meant to be, right?
ok..time to go to class and get it together..
the sartor
Saturday, September 20, 2008
Mecca...thus far...
...is pretty freakin' sweet...
Heya all! It's been a while, hope everyone's doing ok..! I've obv. been making changes and all, and thus hadn't been updating, but here I am again!
So, I am currently a new transplant to San Francisco! I have started my first grad semester at Academy of Art. I am taking Fashion Design 1 (MY FAV THUS FAR), 3D Design 1, and Fashion Illustration 1.
Fashion Design is gonna be a series of classes to help cultivate taste and the design process. This particular section thus far is almost requiring that you be more expressive. The idea is that rules are made to be broken in this class, and I am attempting to to break out of the restraints I've learned to get into with previous assignments and projects. It is already a help just three classes in as far as opening my mind to ideas...(I'm even considering designing womenswear, GO FIGURE!)
3D Design is a patterning class. Both flat pattern and draping, all womens. We have started with making our own blocks, and we are about to make muslins to test them. I feel amazing in that class, because I am definitely one of the fastest and best at it..lol..Marymount's patterning has trained me well! ;) lol.
Fashion Illustration is more of a figure drawing class, but applying it to fashion. We are required to attend a nude model workshop once a week, and we draw from a clothed model in class. we are just learning anatomy and form currently, and we've also talked about real vs. fashion proportions. I really enjoy it. The teacher is very much a positive reinforcer, so even if you felt bad before class, you leave with a certain confidence!
So then I am just starting at the Levi's Flagship store in Union Square (If you ever come visit SF, u HAVE to come in) It's 3 floors. The first level is vintage, when we have it, and a customization area...so amazing. I want to try and work there someday. They do everything from hems and fitting of jeans, to embroidery, screen printing, and bling bling! lol. The Second level is Mens...it's quite nice, and the third is womens. They have the staple fits, then some seasonal stuff, and they are currently doing reissued vintage fits from the late 60s and early 70s. It's also cool, because I got a crash course in the history of denim, and some of the processes...I'm a geek for denim..(CAN U TELL I JUST FINISHED TRAINING TONIGHT?!)
Also, everyone there seems very fun, and relaxed..and hell..I can wear jeans and a tee to work, how kick ass is that?! right!
Also, the city itself is nice. It has the range of city, and nature I like. I can take a 45 min train ride to Ocean Beach. I can(and need to) go to the ZOO. But then there is also lots of art and culture in the city...the people are fun..lots of Asian decent...and lots of artistic people...also a lot of homeless people, kinda sad...
The only downfalls to the city so far is that the weather fluctuates, but that's cool, it gives me an excuse to shop for layers! lol..SELF EXPRESSION! and then also, I miss the gay clubs in DC...for those of you there still, the Club Scene there is actually pretty sweet...we are spoiled..enjoy it!
Also, I've made a few friends. My roommate Brandon is cool. He's from Kansas City..(Kansas...J-Nellie, he knows of Dodge..lol) Elliott is from Santa Cruz, like an hour away..exactly what u'd picture in a CA surf town boy..lol. He invited us to come visit his home..I wanna go so I can see the beach..lol, and then there is Jon, but he is hardly here...he is very stealthy..japanese gamer. And he visits his girlfriend a lot. lol
Then I've made a few friends. Blake I met on the plane. Xavier (my bf) and I refer to him as "Blakes on a plane"..yes, nerdy, I kno. lol Then there is Sarah. She is from Nova..so we connect on that level. Then there is Indigo. She is fun. graduated from Hampton University, and is taking the Grad Merchandising program. She has me laughing CONSTANTLY! then there is Gigi, my class partner. lol We have the same schedule. She is of Philippino decent, and reminds me of Kristin Patricio..sounds JUST LIKE HER! lol. love her already...
O, and Xavier, the guy I'm dating (yea, it was fast...i kno) He's pretty amazing. Has been showing me around town, and introducing me to a lot. He's pretty good to me too...seems genuinely interested in me and my well being!
So, yea, that's an overview...questions?!
k, love you bye bye!
the Sartor
Heya all! It's been a while, hope everyone's doing ok..! I've obv. been making changes and all, and thus hadn't been updating, but here I am again!
So, I am currently a new transplant to San Francisco! I have started my first grad semester at Academy of Art. I am taking Fashion Design 1 (MY FAV THUS FAR), 3D Design 1, and Fashion Illustration 1.
Fashion Design is gonna be a series of classes to help cultivate taste and the design process. This particular section thus far is almost requiring that you be more expressive. The idea is that rules are made to be broken in this class, and I am attempting to to break out of the restraints I've learned to get into with previous assignments and projects. It is already a help just three classes in as far as opening my mind to ideas...(I'm even considering designing womenswear, GO FIGURE!)
3D Design is a patterning class. Both flat pattern and draping, all womens. We have started with making our own blocks, and we are about to make muslins to test them. I feel amazing in that class, because I am definitely one of the fastest and best at it..lol..Marymount's patterning has trained me well! ;) lol.
Fashion Illustration is more of a figure drawing class, but applying it to fashion. We are required to attend a nude model workshop once a week, and we draw from a clothed model in class. we are just learning anatomy and form currently, and we've also talked about real vs. fashion proportions. I really enjoy it. The teacher is very much a positive reinforcer, so even if you felt bad before class, you leave with a certain confidence!
So then I am just starting at the Levi's Flagship store in Union Square (If you ever come visit SF, u HAVE to come in) It's 3 floors. The first level is vintage, when we have it, and a customization area...so amazing. I want to try and work there someday. They do everything from hems and fitting of jeans, to embroidery, screen printing, and bling bling! lol. The Second level is Mens...it's quite nice, and the third is womens. They have the staple fits, then some seasonal stuff, and they are currently doing reissued vintage fits from the late 60s and early 70s. It's also cool, because I got a crash course in the history of denim, and some of the processes...I'm a geek for denim..(CAN U TELL I JUST FINISHED TRAINING TONIGHT?!)
Also, everyone there seems very fun, and relaxed..and hell..I can wear jeans and a tee to work, how kick ass is that?! right!
Also, the city itself is nice. It has the range of city, and nature I like. I can take a 45 min train ride to Ocean Beach. I can(and need to) go to the ZOO. But then there is also lots of art and culture in the city...the people are fun..lots of Asian decent...and lots of artistic people...also a lot of homeless people, kinda sad...
The only downfalls to the city so far is that the weather fluctuates, but that's cool, it gives me an excuse to shop for layers! lol..SELF EXPRESSION! and then also, I miss the gay clubs in DC...for those of you there still, the Club Scene there is actually pretty sweet...we are spoiled..enjoy it!
Also, I've made a few friends. My roommate Brandon is cool. He's from Kansas City..(Kansas...J-Nellie, he knows of Dodge..lol) Elliott is from Santa Cruz, like an hour away..exactly what u'd picture in a CA surf town boy..lol. He invited us to come visit his home..I wanna go so I can see the beach..lol, and then there is Jon, but he is hardly here...he is very stealthy..japanese gamer. And he visits his girlfriend a lot. lol
Then I've made a few friends. Blake I met on the plane. Xavier (my bf) and I refer to him as "Blakes on a plane"..yes, nerdy, I kno. lol Then there is Sarah. She is from Nova..so we connect on that level. Then there is Indigo. She is fun. graduated from Hampton University, and is taking the Grad Merchandising program. She has me laughing CONSTANTLY! then there is Gigi, my class partner. lol We have the same schedule. She is of Philippino decent, and reminds me of Kristin Patricio..sounds JUST LIKE HER! lol. love her already...
O, and Xavier, the guy I'm dating (yea, it was fast...i kno) He's pretty amazing. Has been showing me around town, and introducing me to a lot. He's pretty good to me too...seems genuinely interested in me and my well being!
So, yea, that's an overview...questions?!
k, love you bye bye!
the Sartor
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